If you live in central Nebraska and if you have a very forlorn, somewhat neglected lawn…

And if, by chance, you are standing in your dining room and happen to see a no-longer-little puppy streak by your window with a blue cloth diaper that he snatched from the clothesline…

Do not lose your temper and charge out the door in a fit of blue rage to chase his ever-loving tail and reclaim your beloved cloth diaper WITHOUT PUTTING YOUR SHOES ON. When that little voice urges you to pause and don your nearest pair of shoesies before chasing your worthless dog, for the love of all things holy, DO IT.

Because if you ignore that little voice, you’ll likely find yourself in the same situation I did…barefooted and smack dab in the middle of a stinking thorn patch.

And your feet will hurt. Reeeeeeeeeally bad.

AND you still won’t be able to chase after your worthless dog and his new $25 chew toy.

Anyone need a dog (or two)? Sigh.


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